


Idcirco Non Possumus

by Sphenimersus



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-31
Updated: 2016-01-31
Packaged: 2018-05-17 11:41:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5867917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sphenimersus/pseuds/Sphenimersus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A love returned that can't be held. A love held that isn't returned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Idcirco Non Possumus

**Author's Note:**

> This stemmed from some headcanons that [Sami](http://fawnjensen.tumblr.com/) and I were discussing about on tumblr, which you can find [here](http://fawnjensen.tumblr.com/post/138195010998/this-is-random-but-i-feel-really-sad-now-because-i) and [here](http://fawnjensen.tumblr.com/post/138266240338/youre-so-cruel-i-had-to-write-something-based).

_... numquam tangunt amorem._

Dean opens his eyes wide as he hears the last few words of the witch's chant. _No._ Although he isn't fluent in Latin, he can recognize some words. But it's too late; the knife is in her heart, and she's dying.

Sam looks from the side, beaten against the wall. He heard the last few words. _Who would that be? The one Dean loves most?_

“Sammy,” Dean whispers, barely audible as his face pales. “ _No._ ” He stares at the knife in his hand and pulls it out. He hopes in vain for the corpse of the witch to revive - to remove her final curse.

Sam struggles to stand, heaving heavily as he stumbles to his brother. Not knowing that the curse would affect him, Sam hugs Dean. “It'll be okay. We'll find a cure.”

Dean begins to hug back, but he remembers the witch's last words. “ _No!_ Sam, don't touch me!” The older Winchester scrambles away, praying uselessly for Sam to be alright.

Confused and hurt, Sam looks to Dean and suddenly vomits blood. _What's going on?_ He helplessly thinks.

Dean rushes up to Sam and reaches out his hand but stops. “Sammy,” Dean chokes out a sob. He wants to comfort his brother. Pat his head. Hug him alright. But he can't. It's impossible for them to touch anymore.

A connection forms in Sam's mind. _Quem maxime diligebam_. The one Dean loves most. He blinks twice before gritting out, “Dean, I'll be okay. I love you too. We'll find a way. We will.”

* * *

“Cas,” Dean pleads over the phone. “Help Sam. He needs it. Please.”

“I will be there soon, Dean,” Castiel states.

Arriving at the Winchester brothers’ location, Castiel sees Sam writhing on the floor. He stares, shocked and angered. He immediately turns to Dean, who's crying and muttering useless apologies.

“What happened?” Castiel gruffly and coldly questions. _What did you do for Sam to become like this?!_ He wants to furiously yell, demanding answers from the older Winchester.

Dean wipes his tears and rasps out, “Witch. Curse. Can't touch. Can't help. Sammy,” he moans in sorrow.

Castiel quickly connects the dots and nods, “I'll help Sam. Go get a blanket for Sam.”

Dean nods, standing up to wander to the Impala.

* * *

At the bunker, Castiel helps Sam in while Dean prepares the bed. Once they settle Sam into the bed, the two of them leave the room. They sit at the library chairs, and Castiel waits for Dean's hiccups to subside.

“Sorry,” Dean says with a dry throat.

Castiel shrugs, “There is nothing for you to apologize for. It was, is, the dead witch’s fault. So what is this curse?”

Dean recites the Latin words, “I can't touch Sam; he can't touch me.” He looks to the ex-angel, “Can you fix him? Can you help Sam?” His eyes beg for the answer to be a yes, but the hunter knows that Castiel isn’t an angel anymore. Knows he can’t help anymore.

Castiel shakes his head, “I no longer have the power to cure the curse or help recover Sam immediately.”

Despite expecting that answer, Dean's shoulders slump. After a moment of silence, Dean begins to mumble, “Isn't it disgusting? How I love Sam? He's my brother. He's my fucking brother. Why don't I love him in a brotherly way? If I didn't feel like this, then Sam wouldn't be in pain. It's all my fault, isn't it? Hey, Cas, what do you think?”

 _Yes, it is your fault_ , Castiel wants to nod in agreement. He berates himself for thinking so selfishly, “No, Dean. It's not.”

Suddenly, a pained shriek sounds throughout the bunker. The two rush to where Sam is, who is panting and gasping for air.

Dean immediately makes a move but stops halfway. _I can't touch him._ He moves to the side, hand clutching on to the door frame.

Castiel heads straight for Sam. Internally, he smirks in victory. But he also thinks, _You selfish bastard._

“Dean…” Sam calls out barely above a whisper.

That stops Castiel as he smiles bitterly. _Of course. Even if I can help Sam, I won't be able to have his heart._ He pains at the thought but adjusts Sam to make him more comfortable.

Standing up, Cas looks to Dean, who's staring at Sam in worry. He doesn't notice the jealous glare that Castiel was sending him.

Sighing in relief, Dean turns to Castiel, “Thanks, Cas. And sorry for the trouble.”

Castiel covers his seething emotions and shakes his head in disagreement, “It's not troublesome at all.” Only painful.

**Author's Note:**

> Latin:  
>  _Idcirco non possumus._ \- We can't touch.  
>  _... numquam tangunt amorem._ \- To never touch your love.  
>  _Quem maxime diligebam._ \- The one you love most.


End file.
